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  1. #1
    Hipster Squad Commander
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    Default Clients from Hell

    http://clientsfromhell.tumblr.com/

    found this today while i'm bored at work... having some great laughs cause i have clients like this too, so good
    if a woman is crushed by a tree in the forest...what was the forest doing in the kitchen?

  2. #2
    Custom User Title
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    Default

    This guy works with retards.
    -Jeff

  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    Default

    "A collection of anonymously contributed client horror stories from designers."
    Esquared "I pop peels, and cop feels, and we let it rip like beyblades"

  4. #4
    aka doug aka hard gay
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    Default

    seen it, so hilarious

  5. #5
    The Yeti
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    Default

    This is my life...frackin IT helpdesk.

    "Client: “We’re trying to watch the DVD with the advert on but we can’t hear it. We’re really not happy. You need to bring a new DVD over asap.”

    Me: “What are you playing the DVD on?”

    Client: “My receptionist’s computer.”

    Me: “Does it have speakers?”

    Client: “No, will you send some over?”

    Me: “No.”


    hahah, Holy shit "Optimize the fireball"

    "You mean the firewall?"
    Team Wookie
    Live every week...like it's shark week.

  6. #6
    SOMB Veteran
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    Default

    my sister showed me this this week. Amazing.
    Rob Bennett: J-Gordon Team Rider

  7. #7
    Indiellectual
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    Default

    Client [A California law firm]: “For the home page we’d like a photo of San Francisco. Lots of tall buildings, and it has to include the Golden Gate bridge.”

    Me: “Sure, I can do that … but your offices aren’t in San Francisco.”

    Client: “No, but we want people to think we are. It creates trust.”

    hahahahahahahahah how ironic

    omg haha

    Client: “I want the site to be metallic and cool, like ‘blow your head off’ cool, like the Transformers”

    Me: “This is for a wedding photography business, right?”

    Client: “So? Optimus Prime can’t shoot a fracking picture?”

  8. #8
    The Yeti
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    Default

    Dude the transformers one had me rolling.
    Team Wookie
    Live every week...like it's shark week.

  9. #9
    SOMB Veteran
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    Default

    A client once gave me some text which included a spelling error. Instead of saying “you spelled that wrong” I tried to be tactful about it. I said I wasn’t sure about the spelling so I looked it up in the dictionary and discovered that it was spelled differently. Then the client insisted that there was a typo in the dictionary and we had to go to press with the spelling mistake.
    Rob Bennett: J-Gordon Team Rider

  10. #10
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    Default

    I swear this guys was at my work the other day:"Of course I want it today! If I want it tomorrow, I’ll order it tomorrow!"
    Rob Bennett: J-Gordon Team Rider

  11. #11
    SOMB Veteran
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    Default

    Client: “Hmmm, could you make it bigger?”

    Me: “That’s what she said.”

    Client: “You’re out.”
    "i dont even know what that means. eat my frack" -ToeKnee

  12. #12
    THE DUTCHESS
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    Default

    this is hilarious
    Exile Skimboards - Distributor (Netherlands/ Belgium/ Germany)
    Resistance Wetsuits - Distributor (Netherlands)

  13. #13
    Senior Member
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    Default

    Client: “I know what people like. I’m around people all day and I watch people - like a student of human behavior - so I know what people like.”

    Me: “Ok. What do you have in mind?”

    Client: “What people like… Aligators and Hedgehogs.”

    haha

  14. #14
    Know It All
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    Default

    Oh man. Some of the shit I've heard over the years from customers/clients is mind boggling. When I worked in the Ventura harbor for a while "excuse me, do the people who own the boats out in the harbor have to swim to the?" DEAD SERIOUS too. *jaw hits ground* I told her "only the ones that aren't connected to a dock" Lol
    Southern California - A sunny place for shady people.
    'alot' is not a word.

  15. #15
    Senior Member
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    Default

    Client: “We really love the design! However, can you make our website less cutting-edge? Our clients aren’t really that good at using the Internet and won’t use all of the bells-and-whistles.”

    Me: “What are you referring to specifically?”

    Client: “We don’t need the login area. None of our customers will use that.”

    Me: “OK, well it is an e-commerce store so I’m not quite sure how you’re going to get paid without being able to identify the client.”

    Client: “Well, you’re the designer and you’ve done a great job so far so I’m sure you can figure something out. Look at Google! You don’t have to login to their site and they’re making tons of money!”

    that is painful

  16. #16
    Know It All
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    Default

    When I read the title of the thread I thought Richard had a change of heart and started a Death Metal band.
    Southern California - A sunny place for shady people.
    'alot' is not a word.

  17. #17
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    Default

    Email from client: “What we really want is a function where the user visits our website and the instant they do so it fires up Microsoft Word on their computer and starts filling out an order form. We think we would get massive revenue this way.”

    This man is a genius!
    UNCW Skim Club President

  18. #18
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    Default

    I think I've experienced like 95% of those (at least thematically, maybe not the exact same details).

    Funny and sad-but-true.

  19. #19
    Senior Member
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    Default

    UHH...



    Client: “No one is reading the emails we sent them. Is there a way we can keep emailing them until they log into our site?”

    Me: “No, that’s called spamming.”

    [30 minutes later]

    Client: “So can we keep sending emails to people until they respond?”

  20. #20
    Senior Member
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    Default

    he wont stop spamming



    can we get this kid off the messageboard..?






    ......can we get this kid off the messageboard

  21. #21
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    Default

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    thanks for making my afternoon.

    +1

 

 

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