View Full Version : heres a good one

05-29-2007, 03:07 PM
Blonde Murder Victim

WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (the actual AP headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her inlaws, and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head. One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour. The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.

And, yes, Linda is a blonde.

05-29-2007, 03:10 PM
yeah, most people dont realize this, but holding your brains in will save you after being shot in the head

05-29-2007, 03:23 PM
ahaha. what a stupid bitch.

05-29-2007, 03:25 PM
Damn this is like from middle school but still a classic!

05-29-2007, 03:27 PM
retarded. no other words.

05-29-2007, 03:32 PM
hahhahahahaahahahahhahaa this was hilarious

05-29-2007, 03:56 PM
brains feel like bread dough?

05-29-2007, 03:59 PM
I heard that a while ago. I didn't know where it had happened.

05-29-2007, 04:08 PM
o i thought she was burnett. hahahahhahahh dumb bitch

05-29-2007, 04:23 PM
yeah same thing happend to me but it was ketchup n i was really baked...mmmmmmmm biscuits

05-29-2007, 04:24 PM
wow. funny as hell though.

05-29-2007, 04:26 PM
omg that was awsome

05-29-2007, 04:34 PM
yeah, most people dont realize this, but holding your brains in will save you after being shot in the head

Yeah, so she isn't really a dumb blonde then?

05-29-2007, 04:36 PM
nope, she just has some good first aid knowledge

05-29-2007, 08:53 PM
yeah that's mad old. Who knows if it's even true or not, but it's funny as hell.

05-30-2007, 06:51 AM